Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

    My God, this sounds like something from "Who's Line is it Anyway?"... Except it's real!!!

    Film production company Crystal Sky Pictures has secured a $200 million theatrical slate financing deal with Grosvenor Park, according to a report by Hollywood trade magazine Variety. The deal covers five features, including movie adaptations for Konami's video game series Castlevania and Namco's Pac-Man.

    ...

    Said Crystal Sky Pictures CEO and president Steve Paul: "This financing is helping us in our expansion plans to greenlight films more quickly. We're now one of the few companies to have a big budget with which to develop our slate."

    http://www.gamasutra.com/php-bin/new...hp?story=18745
    So, Castlevania aside... let's hear your best plot synopsis for Pac-Man.

    Which Hollywood A-listers would you cast and what kind of movie would it be? More importantly, how would you fit Pac-Man's immortal "wakka wakka" catchphrase into the script? I'd also like to hear your theories on what kind of drugs they were on when they signed the deal.

    Oh, and here's a quick rundown of Hollywood's past videogame efforts. What other unlikely videogame movie adaptations do you want to see in the future? Tetris perhaps? SkiFree? Q*bert? Moreover, can you come up with a more original tagline than: "This ain't no game!" (used by no less than 3 films - Mario Bros., Double Dragon, and Dungeons and Dragons).

  • #2
    Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

    Sounds like fun.

    Plot: Evil bright-colored suit wearing bad guys have kidnapped Jackson Tommie's family, numbering in the thousands, killed them, and lined them all up head to toe around the small Scotland town of St. Drews. When Jack wakes up, he sees a note with simply the words "wakka wakka" and knows who had done this to his family and vows revenge. How he knew will be discovered in the sequel Pack-Man 2: Game Over. He retreats to his secret lab and builds a yellow suit of armor with a giant mouth to "Bring my family back to me!" Once in the streets, a person sees Jack, in his yellow armor, eating everything and says "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! YOU EVEN ATE THE PACKAGE ON MY DOORSTEP! YOU - YOU PACKAGE EATING MAN". Jack, who'd been trying to think of a name for his armor mutters "Package man... Age Man.... Pack.... Pac-Man!" and continues on his way.

    In the final epic eatout in a "Vitamin X" warehouse in the top right corner of St. Drews, the bright colored suit clad bad guys attempt to fill up one of Jack's family members with "Vitamin X" in a last ditch effort to slow Pac-Man down. When Pac-Man devours this family member his suit gets a pill stuck in a gear, causing a huge overload of the power systems, making the suit to go crazy. The bad guys start running as this is their last chance to escape. However, the suit's power systems explode, sending the suit, mouth open, hurling into the bad guys, eating them in an instant.

    Jack, having been thrown from the suit in the explosion, comes to, and seeing that the suit had gotten the bad guys, exits the warehouse in exhaustion. As he loosely walks out onto the street he sits by a cherry bush, and begins eating them as the sun comes up.

    Fade to black, credits, and then fade back in. Starting from a bird's eye view of the town, the camera zooms in to the very center of town to a large building's front door. The same bright colored suit men walk out. This leaves room for the Sequel.


    Epic, I tell ya. If I was a movie company CEO, I'd greenlight my script in a heartbeat.
    <insert cool digital image here>

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

      http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1688967
      ~+Impure Thoughts, Unethical Movements, A Shifting of the Soul into the Deeper Darker Secrets+~

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

        I don't know what's worse, this or Ridley Scott's forthcoming Monopoly movie......




        V----Maddie, that sounds like it's ripped from Aronofsky's Requiem for a Dream
        Last edited by Raveness; 05-24-2008, 04:03 AM. Reason: Maddie's post below
        Mirrors are more fun than Television

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

          "YOU - YOU PACKAGE EATING MAN" - now that's inspired. Good going AlianAnt.

          "Uwe Boll presents a Paul Anderson Production"

          Actually that video kind of reminds me of this.

          Of course, I always assumed Pac-Man would be harrowing drama deglamourising the realities of drug abuse. Obviously Pac-Man is trapped in a downward spiral of addiction -- the more he consumes, the harder it becomes for him to function in the "real world". He experiences what I like to call a 'social disconnect'. Of course, to sympathise with Pac-Man, we have to understand that he is a victim of modern society -- the banality of consumerism, social conformity, and sensationalism have driven him to a reckless lifestyle of excess consumption. Ironically, the film would point out that Pac-Man's hunger for "the next level" is what ultimately consumes him.

          The action of the piece would be chiefly set in Pac-Man's psychotic nightmare world. Themes of paranoia and claustrophobia would be symbolised by a labyrinthine prison (this is a visual metaphor that will reoccur throughout the film - each time, slightly different). As you would expect, Pac-Man's inner demons would haunt this place -- chasing him down endlessly looping corridors to infinity; tempting him down blind alleys and dead ends until he succumbs to madness. Thus, in an elaborate game of cat-and-mouse, Pac-Man has to outwit his spectral adversaries, and perhaps even turn the tides in a surprising moment of role reversal.

          Of course, the real hero of the film is Ms. Pac-Man. The overall message of the piece is that we are nothing without our friends and family to support us -- to help us out when times get tough. Ms. Pac-Man (a feminist icon, sure to reach out to the female audience out there) embodies this role, and in the film's finale has to make the ultimate sacrifice for love. In the film's moving climax, Ms. Pac-Man metaphorically enters Pac-Man's nightmare world, frightens the demons away, and provides Pac-Man with a path to healthy recovery. A path sure to be wrought with obstacles along the way, but a path they can tackle together. The curtain closes as Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man share the fruits of their labour. Whether or not the couple achieve the 'High-Score' is left to the audience to contemplate.

          Powerful stuff indeed, and I think you'll agree Pac-Man is a hip "youth icon" that will no doubt speak to the kids of today. Of course, at this point you may be thinking: "That wasn't very original", "It's been done before" or "I could have probably thought of that". And you'd be right, because Pac-Man's story is a common one -- one we see everyday as we go about our business. But it is a story society chooses to ignore. This is why it's doubly important that the powerful message of 'Pac-Man The Movie' is realised and passed down to our children, and our children's children - for generations to come.

          Maddie, that sounds like it's ripped from Aronofsky's Requiem for a Dream
          Clearly they're quite similar, but remember, Pac-Man is ultimately a story about hope, about the choices Pac-Man (and by abstraction, the audience) can make at any given moment. Like Pac-Man, the audience can choose which path they want to take through the maze... of life.


          ---
          Ok, I'm done - I'm gonna throw up now.

          In all seriousness, I'll have to check that film out -- I probably won't be able to get the Pac-Man parallels out of my head though.

          Oh, and Raveness, how on earth do you manage to summon obscure (yet brilliantly relevant) movie screencaps like that? I find it both awe-inspiring and disturbing at the same time.
          Last edited by Maddieman; 05-24-2008, 05:29 AM. Reason: Added 20% more BS

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

            Originally posted by Maddieman View Post
            In all seriousness, I'll have to check that film out -- I probably won't be able to get the Pac-Man parallels out of my head though.

            Oh, and Raveness, how on earth do you manage to summon obscure (yet brilliantly relevant) movie screencaps like that? I find it both awe-inspiring and disturbing at the same time.
            I have been told I have an eidetic memory for aural things, ‘total recall’ for lack of a better term

            So I remembered that I first saw this Pacman movie news in an article that also explained the Monopoly movie. Being a fan of Ridley Scott’s work, I was baffled that he was attached to it. I said to myself “Ridley, this is the stupidest thing I have ever heard”, like to an old friend you cherished and respected. That triggered the memory of the obscure but similar sounding line from Dungeons and Dragons. The most disturbing part is that I actually remembered something from Dungeons and Dragons

            Most of the time responding in caps is simply the best representation of my feelings through a reflection of my love of movies.
            Mirrors are more fun than Television

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

              Most of the time responding in caps is simply the best representation of my feelings through a reflection of my love of movies.
              This is an understatement.

              She's done this before and I challenge anyone here to be able to keep up with her, but try to have an entire conversation using only screencaps. By entire, I mean a back-and-forth of perhaps four or five phrases, and by conversation I mean that the phrases capped actually fit to the sentiment of what's being said.
              ~+Impure Thoughts, Unethical Movements, A Shifting of the Soul into the Deeper Darker Secrets+~

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

                Originally posted by Raveness View Post
                The most disturbing part is that I actually remembered something from Dungeons and Dragons
                How could you forget something as bad as this?

                Most of the time responding in caps is simply the best representation of my feelings through a reflection of my love of movies.
                That part I can understand. What I'm curious to find out is whether or not you have thousands of obscure screencaps stored on your computer, ready to upload at a whim; or if you've got a huge dvd collection (including the aforementioned Dungeons and Dragons ), and therefore spent the better part of 15 minutes capturing and uploading said screencap - with the dialogue.

                Not that I'm implying that that's in any way eccentric behaviour.
                [SIZE="1"](Says the guy who spent way too much time on that joke Pac-Man synopsis)[/SIZE]

                She's done this before and I challenge anyone here to be able to keep up with her, but try to have an entire conversation using only screencaps.
                Although I can think of the perfect opening gambit*; personally, I don't think I've got the stamina. Raveness is clearly in her element here - the leap from Pac-man, to Monopoly, to Ridley Scott, and then back to the Dungeons and Dragons movie was very impressive.

                Speaking of which, Monopoly... hmm, that is a pretty unlikely movie, but I can see them maybe doing it like Wall Street or something. The thing is, would they make awful references to the game in the script, by quoting stuff like "do not pass Go" in the middle of a heated debate:

                -"What the hell were you thinking!? If you keep this up, you're going to go directly to jail - do not pass Go, do not collect $200!"
                -"Hey man, it was a chance, and I had to take it!"
                ...

                Didn't they do a Snakes and Ladders movie at one point?

                * [SIZE="1"]I don't have this on DVD, but the clue is in my avatar.[/SIZE]

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

                  'Do not pass Go, do not collect $200' has been a staple in American colloquia for as long as I can remember. Not often said in the last few years, but simply mention it and people know exactly what you're saying, and it's still considered a good sarcastic reply.

                  That being said, yes I think it would flow pretty much exactly as you said.
                  ~+Impure Thoughts, Unethical Movements, A Shifting of the Soul into the Deeper Darker Secrets+~

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

                    'Do not pass Go, do not collect $200' has been a staple in American colloquia for as long as I can remember. Not often said in the last few years, but simply mention it and people know exactly what you're saying, and it's still considered a good sarcastic reply.
                    Same here, and that's exactly why it would be so awkward in a Monopoly film - it would be expected of them to include it at some point.

                    It's like how in almost every awful videogame movie, the hero has to 'transform' from an average Joe into their videogame persona. My favourite is Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, with James Remar's transformation from Raiden into Vanilla Ice.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

                      Originally posted by Maddieman View Post
                      That part I can understand. What I'm curious to find out is whether or not you have thousands of obscure screencaps stored on your computer, ready to upload at a whim; or if you've got a huge dvd collection (including the aforementioned Dungeons and Dragons ), and therefore spent the better part of 15 minutes capturing and uploading said screencap - with the dialogue.

                      Not that I'm implying that that's in any way eccentric behaviour.
                      [SIZE="1"](Says the guy who spent way too much time on that joke Pac-Man synopsis)[/SIZE]
                      According to my caps folder in Photobucket, I have 626 so far. My DVD collection is roughly around 300 or so, not including box sets of TV shows. Whether those numbers are high or low is relative I guess. I usually cap something when I watch the movie and think the line is apt, or sufficiently cheesy. I’m certainly eccentric in many people’s books, and I wouldn’t be where I am if I wasn’t



                      And Enix.....
                      Mirrors are more fun than Television

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: This ain't no game! Pac-Man: The Movie

                        I stand by my previous statement then - I'd clearly be out of my depth in a battle for screencap supremacy.

                        Comment

                        Working...
                        X